Blogging at Work

Not something I'd normally do. But I'm bored. Sure, I have tons of stuff I could be doing, but I don't wanna do it. Normally I'd just suck it up and do it, but this is way more fun, which is sad because blogging isn't even all that much fun.

The worst part about this work day is that it isn't even close to being over. Coming in at a close second would be the fact that I can't even really get away with covertly working on my portfolio as I have absolutely no privacy. My efforts to type this blog are insanely risky as it is. I'd like to think that if I didn't have this job and for some reason could afford to not have a job, I'd spend my day hard at work perfecting my book so that I can get the job I want; or at least have as productive a day as my good friend who blows through about 3 books a week and isn't nearly as miserable; but alas, I know I'd probably sleep until noon and play video games all afternoon. At least for the first week or so. Then I might mix in some movies I bought and still haven't watched, a day or two of nothing but The Simpsons or The Shield and a random trip to a museum, if I actually managed to get out of the house before 2.

The point is my job consists of coming in and doing the exact same thing every day, which I'm pretty sure couldn't be any more boring and unstimulating. I don't even know if unstimulating is a word, and Lord knows I have enough time to look it up, but I'm not going to. I don't care. The situation isn't helped by the fact that I desperately need to shave my face as it itches worse than a wool hat on a bald head.

It's been about 15 minutes since I started writing this and it feels like an eternity. The Flash won't be able to catch up to me when I bounce outta here at 5.

As a complete aside, there is an ongoing dilemma at the office involving a crazy boss and his excessive ordering of yogurts that no one eats. Thank the Almighty Jebus (or Allah, Buddha, God, Vishnu, Sheeba or whatever deity you may pray to, cuz I don't have one) that I don't work for him. Probably woulda stabbed someone long ago.

I have a new job!

Fooled you! I don't have a new job. 

Part 3 of my randomly posted 'trying-to-get-into-advertising-as-a-writer' blog:

I'm now enrolled in two classes:  a Photoshop class through SVA and another AdHouse class being taught by one of the guys I used to work under at Lowe. Both seem to be going well, although I've only had one AdHouse class and although I left inspired, I soon ended up feeling terrified. It's being conducted in a vastly different way than I'm used to and it seems as though this instructor will be far more harsh and direct and require the utmost of excellence from everyone, which shouldn't be so terrifying, but it is. I should be elated that I'm going to be pushed to perform at my utmost and be forced to use my skills and talents. Instead I'm afraid of failure and disappointing someone that, even if it was only for nine weeks, knows me. Is this normal? I have no clue. I lost all concept of what was a normal thought process when I was 14 or 15 (another story for a different venue). If I succeed, I might actually finish this class with a book good enough to get hired, which is a thrilling thought. If I fail, I may be done for good. And then what? I don't really like being miserable.

In terms of a new job, I don't have one. An opportunity seems to have rolled down the side of a hill and by happenstance landed awkwardly in my lap, but I think it is quickly falling through that hole in middle of legs when I sit cross-legged. I'm still holding out hope though. The whole process has been slow.

Balls.

My Dream (candi)Date

Obama had me at hello. Maybe he didn't get me that easily, but it didn't take long for me to feel good about ignoring my cynicism and disenfranchisement just long enough to cast my primary vote for him. Past politicians haven't been so lucky (or good), especially when they burn you so badly. Do I think the personal lives of politicians should be scrutinized so much that you have to share with the media the color of your colon polyps or explain to Joe Backcountry why you prefer a glass of wine & a mean grilled chicken salad over an Old Milwaukee and eggs marinated in bacon grease with a stick of butter for a side? No, I think that's a bit absurd. But when it surfaces that you've been plugging a 20-something year old hooker in nothing but your business socks (cue Flight of the Conchords) with your Willy Wonka free and clear - while married - you should be shamed out of office; especially if you're dumb enough to get caught. If you're a swinging bachelor and my governor that's tough on crime and corruption, then by all means bang away (provided prostitution is legal in your state of banging). Married - the tally wacker has to stay in the pants, especially when the Mrs. is still hot. However, I have seriously digressed.

Obama swept me off my feet. I can picture it now:  Him struggling to carry me over the threshold - me staring deeply into his inspiring eyes as he goes in for the kiss - then realizing he's a dude and I'm not gay. Here's why he has me questioning my cynicism:  As a young, reasonably educated American voter, I see Congress and the Executive Branch as a bunch of old, rich, out-of-touch fucks who do everything in their power to completely ruin the lives of the people of the US who do not directly participate in government or contribute to their campaigns. This includes Democrats and Republicans:  they're all a bunch of corrupt bastards. Tax cuts for the wealthy and ear marks for billion-dollar plus corporations; corporate welfare that outspends social programs by the 100s of billions, while cutting education, backing out of the Kyoto Protocol and denying climate change; launching preemptive, unjustified wars, getting blown by ugly interns, stealing elections and denying the basic rights of citizenship to protect us from "enemy combatants" who are trying to take away those same rights. It's mind-boggling there hasn't been a violent uprising. Of course, I think politicians have done such an excellent job (with the help of complacent media) to lull us into total and complete apathy, that they can get away with anything (see above); so that when someone, anyone comes along talking about change, its hard not to get swept up in it.

There have been many in the past that have talked about change. But one way or another they've been alienated, discredited or otherwise weeded out by the establishment. But not Obama. He's still around because, so far as we can tell, he's played by the establishment's rules and hasn't had unprotected sex with a $1000/hr hooker or attempted to solicit sex in a Minnesota airport bathroom or launder money in off-shore accounts or receive bribes or send e-mails laced with sexually explicit material to Senate pages or solicit sex from an intern or send 40,000 sexually explicit text messages on his government issued cell phone to a woman on his staff. He's been on the up and up. Perhaps that's why his "change" idea seems so believable. The cynic in me says never trust any politico, they all talk about change. LBJ talked about change and dug us further into Vietnam. Reagan talked about change and shipped billions of dollars to right-wing militants who, when in power, were on every single Human Rights Watch List for carrying out horrible atrocities against dissenters. Reagan's administration and the CIA during his presidency also protected and in some cases, assisted, drug dealers and importers as the said dealers and importers flooded South Central LA with crack cocaine. Spitzer talked about change. They all talk about change. But something always breaks their will and sucks them into the government machine until there is nothing left but a broken spirit and an angry public.

So why am I so taken with Obama?

He seems believable. I don't care if he doesn't like beer. I don't care if he sucks at bowling. I don't care if he hates grits and is a hoighty toighty prissy pants when it comes to food and his social life. He's willing to open up negotiations and explore new avenues beyond trying to kill everyone. Talk may not work. It didn't always work for J Carter. So Obama says if talk doesn't work, he'll kill some fuckers. Okay. Seems reasonable. It's things like this that are winning over my inner cynic. The things he is saying are different. The way he's saying them are different. The resolve in his voice is different. His ideas are different. And to a generation that has grown up with the same shit from both sides failing over and over again, different means good. Because if we try different this time and it fails, we really can't be much worse off than we are right now with the same old shit.

I have gas

No matter what you do, energy costs are going to go up. You tax oil profits, oil companies pass the increase on to consumers. Force energy companies to invest in renewable resources, prices go up. Use more food-based biofuels, prices of energy and food go up. Pass a gas tax, demand and prices go up. The only thing that will drive prices down is greater supply, which ain't gonna happen:  a) it's not worth ruining the environment; b) it's not worth pouring more money into foreign countries; c) companies and countries are making too much money to have any interest in driving prices down. Personally, I think high prices are a blessing in disguise. High prices mean less driving, which means less heat and pollution. High prices force the markets and businesses to adapt or die. This means more energy efficient, "greener" technology:  Cars with increasing gas mileage, fuel cells, renewable non-food based biofuels, hybrids, wind and solar power plants, emission capture and an overall reduction of CO2 and pollutants. Perhaps with all this effort, some of the lakes that have dried up and left people desolate will come back. This isn't about profits and politics anymore, it's about survival. The next great wars will be fought over food and access to clean water. At the rate we're going, we'll run out of both. Desperation and crisis force change. The change that should've started 30 years ago when these problems first arose. Complacency is the nemesis of success, and in this case, survival. It is time to stop taking everything for granted and realize the US is a part of this world, too, and unless we come together as one world to change the course of the future, the Earth will heal itself by getting rid of all of us.