My Dream (candi)Date

Obama had me at hello. Maybe he didn't get me that easily, but it didn't take long for me to feel good about ignoring my cynicism and disenfranchisement just long enough to cast my primary vote for him. Past politicians haven't been so lucky (or good), especially when they burn you so badly. Do I think the personal lives of politicians should be scrutinized so much that you have to share with the media the color of your colon polyps or explain to Joe Backcountry why you prefer a glass of wine & a mean grilled chicken salad over an Old Milwaukee and eggs marinated in bacon grease with a stick of butter for a side? No, I think that's a bit absurd. But when it surfaces that you've been plugging a 20-something year old hooker in nothing but your business socks (cue Flight of the Conchords) with your Willy Wonka free and clear - while married - you should be shamed out of office; especially if you're dumb enough to get caught. If you're a swinging bachelor and my governor that's tough on crime and corruption, then by all means bang away (provided prostitution is legal in your state of banging). Married - the tally wacker has to stay in the pants, especially when the Mrs. is still hot. However, I have seriously digressed.

Obama swept me off my feet. I can picture it now:  Him struggling to carry me over the threshold - me staring deeply into his inspiring eyes as he goes in for the kiss - then realizing he's a dude and I'm not gay. Here's why he has me questioning my cynicism:  As a young, reasonably educated American voter, I see Congress and the Executive Branch as a bunch of old, rich, out-of-touch fucks who do everything in their power to completely ruin the lives of the people of the US who do not directly participate in government or contribute to their campaigns. This includes Democrats and Republicans:  they're all a bunch of corrupt bastards. Tax cuts for the wealthy and ear marks for billion-dollar plus corporations; corporate welfare that outspends social programs by the 100s of billions, while cutting education, backing out of the Kyoto Protocol and denying climate change; launching preemptive, unjustified wars, getting blown by ugly interns, stealing elections and denying the basic rights of citizenship to protect us from "enemy combatants" who are trying to take away those same rights. It's mind-boggling there hasn't been a violent uprising. Of course, I think politicians have done such an excellent job (with the help of complacent media) to lull us into total and complete apathy, that they can get away with anything (see above); so that when someone, anyone comes along talking about change, its hard not to get swept up in it.

There have been many in the past that have talked about change. But one way or another they've been alienated, discredited or otherwise weeded out by the establishment. But not Obama. He's still around because, so far as we can tell, he's played by the establishment's rules and hasn't had unprotected sex with a $1000/hr hooker or attempted to solicit sex in a Minnesota airport bathroom or launder money in off-shore accounts or receive bribes or send e-mails laced with sexually explicit material to Senate pages or solicit sex from an intern or send 40,000 sexually explicit text messages on his government issued cell phone to a woman on his staff. He's been on the up and up. Perhaps that's why his "change" idea seems so believable. The cynic in me says never trust any politico, they all talk about change. LBJ talked about change and dug us further into Vietnam. Reagan talked about change and shipped billions of dollars to right-wing militants who, when in power, were on every single Human Rights Watch List for carrying out horrible atrocities against dissenters. Reagan's administration and the CIA during his presidency also protected and in some cases, assisted, drug dealers and importers as the said dealers and importers flooded South Central LA with crack cocaine. Spitzer talked about change. They all talk about change. But something always breaks their will and sucks them into the government machine until there is nothing left but a broken spirit and an angry public.

So why am I so taken with Obama?

He seems believable. I don't care if he doesn't like beer. I don't care if he sucks at bowling. I don't care if he hates grits and is a hoighty toighty prissy pants when it comes to food and his social life. He's willing to open up negotiations and explore new avenues beyond trying to kill everyone. Talk may not work. It didn't always work for J Carter. So Obama says if talk doesn't work, he'll kill some fuckers. Okay. Seems reasonable. It's things like this that are winning over my inner cynic. The things he is saying are different. The way he's saying them are different. The resolve in his voice is different. His ideas are different. And to a generation that has grown up with the same shit from both sides failing over and over again, different means good. Because if we try different this time and it fails, we really can't be much worse off than we are right now with the same old shit.